Over the years, staff at MOTOR, Wheels, CarThrottle, and WhichCar have compiled various lists, both for publication and amusement, of some of the world’s worst car names.
I’ve popped them all into one place for you to browse in bewilderment.
1: Mitsubishi Minica Lettuce
Because all the best cars are named after leafy vegetables.
2: Mitsubishi Carisma
It’s difficult to imagine a car with less charisma, no matter how much Mitsubishi wants us to think otherwise.
3: Honda W.O.W
A concept built for the 2005 Tokyo Motor Show, the Honda W.O.W (standing for Wonderful Open-Hearted Wagon) is designed specifically for the needs of dog owners…Possibly a reminiscent of the Doge meme?
4: Scion xD
It looks like someone’s laughing at the name “Scion.”
5: Isuzu TF
Is it me, or was Isuzu having a “What The Fuck” moment when the made this truck?
6: Great Wall Wingle/Wingle 3/Wingle 5
It sounds like a toilet break while trekking in China, but we’re assured it’s the name of a pick-up. Thank Great Wall Motors it was renamed as the Steed in the European markets.
7: SsangYong Rodius
Rodius is an inaccurate portmanteau of the words road and Zeus, which is intended to mean “King of the Road.” Zeus is the Greek god of gods, so comparing this ugly SsangYong minivan to him should be considered blasphemy in Greece.
8: Proton Satria Son of a Gun XLi
When it comes to badly-named Protons, this just wins out over the ‘Satria Neo’.
9: Proton Putra
Any self-respecting Romanian person would instantly nickname it the Putrid.
10: Vauxhall/Opel Mokka
I like coffee. I like cars. But that doesn’t mean I want a car named after a sort of coffee bean. Thank Buick it was renamed as the Encore in the USA.
11: Daihatsu Naked
Just imagine telling people you own a “Naked.” Awkward.
12: Citroën C4 Cactus
Because nobody wants to touch it!
13: Renault Le Car
“Can you go move The Car into the driveway?” “Which car?” “The Car!” “But which one?!”
15: Ferrari LaFerrari
“Can you go move The Ferrari into the driveway?” “Which Ferrari?” “The Ferrari The Ferrari!” “But which one?!”
16: Li Shi Guang Ming The Book of Songs
“Can you go move the Book of Songs…” Oh fuck off.
17: Suzuki Cappuccino
I like coffee. I like cars. But that doesn’t mean I want a car named after a sort of Italian coffee drink.
18: Mitsubishi Pajero
A fine off-roader and a fine name for English-speakers, but plenty of people are blissfully unaware that, in Spanish, this car is essentially called the Mistubishi Wanker or Jerk. Don’t go asking to rent a Pajero if you visit Mexico.
19: Isuzu Bighorn Plaisir
In Europe, Isuzu called this car the Trooper. Boring! Japanese buyers had the pleasure of calling it, much more temptingly, the Bighorn Plaisir. If the idea of a Bighorn Plaisir Long gets you breaking into a sweat, Izusu also made a Plaisir Short as well.
20: Mazda Bongo Friendee
Someone must have been on a bongo when they named this unfortunate mishap. Thank Ford it was renamed as the Freda in some Japanese markets.
21: Pagani Huayra
The Pagani Huayra has the stupidest sounding name for a supercar, when you can actually pronounce it correctly that is. Sounds like somebody’s questioning the name “Pagani.”
22: Peugeot Bipper
No one would question that ‘Fiat Fiorino’ is quite a fine name. It was even quite a fine LCV. Then Peugeot went and spoiled it all by creating a version that sounded like some crappy robber tactic.
23: Fiat Qubo
With the Fiorino-based Fiat Qubo, Fiat designed the finest LCV in the history of the universe… and then named it after a Kids TV Network. We do realise that each word in the Fiat’s name has its own significance; however, we just wish that Fiat had common sense and called the Qubo something a little less nerdy.
24: Citroën Nemo
It’s the Fiat Fiorino, which is a fine name for a car that has aged well and gained a little cult following. But the Citroën version, albeit still fine, is named after a children’s movie. That’s just stupid. Even worse, if you bought a Citroën Nemo with the optional Enterprise pack, you’d be the proud owner of the Citroën Nemo Enterprises. More like a business name than a car name.
25: Shuanghuan Noble/Bubble
Neither swift like a knight nor noble. Neither can it float like a bubble!
26: Shuanghuan SCEO/CEO
SCEO or CEO on a car is just plain stupid. Terrible name for a car belonging to the CEO of a business. The clue’s right in the name!
27: Opel Karl
Did they name this discontinued car after Karl Marx or what?
28: Mazda Secret Hideout
But it’s yellow, so not that secret.
29: Isuzu MU Rodeo
Who ever thought this was a good idea?
30: Subaru BRAT
Doesn’t start when required, slams the door shut behind you.
31: Nissan Friend-ME
This concept car looked OK but the name reeked of desperation in the age of generation Facebook. Nissan’s insistence that it be stylised Friend-ME made it sound whinier still. Fortunately, when the production version arrived in 2015, Nissan chose the name “Lannia” instead.
32: Ford Probe
Nothing pleasant is followed by the word “probe.”
33: Mitsubishi MUM 500 ‘Shall We Join Us?’
When Lamborghini runs out of heroic bulls after which to knight its new supercars, it could learn a thing or two from this three-cylinder Mitsubishi micro-car. Rolls right off the tongue.
34: Pontiac Torrent
After the PR and sales disaster caused by the Aztek, Pontiac needed a people mover that was a hit. Unfortunately, General Motors decided the Torrent was the answer. A Chevy Equinox with different badging, the Torrent launched with the 185 horsepower 3.5L V6. More like Pontiac Wheezer rather than Pontiac Torrent.
35: Geely BL “Beauty Leopard”
Neither fast like a leopard, nor beautiful.
36: Geely Borui GC9
Yeah, I obviously don’t like Geely’s missteps here, but seriously, “Borui” sounds like “mullet fish” on a car in Africa. More like “Geely Fish GC9.”
37: Ford Freestyle
Sounds like a skateboard or skate park.
38: Ford Taurus X
A badly named Ford Freestyle version named after…cows? Very bullish.
39: Ford Five Hundred
‘Can you go move the Five Hundred into the driveway?’ ‘Which Five Hundred?’ ‘The Five Hundred!’ ‘But which one?!’
40: Mitsubishi Toppo Best Joy Guppy
Named after the best fish in the tank, perhaps. Mitsubishi is really on a roll.
41: Mitsubishi Pistachio
Because all the best cars are named after nuts.
42: Austin Princess
“Princess” doesn’t exactly denote a thrusting executive saloon.
43: Mazda Laputa
Laputa was the flying island in Gulliver’s Travels. Unfortunately it is also a Spanish term for “a prostitute.”
44: Mitsubishi Minica Winky
Proudly displayed on Mitsubishi’s stand at the 1985 Tokyo Motor Show was a microcar called the Minica Winky. Nuggy-nuggie.
45: Team Fordzilla P1 by Ford
Sounds brassy and tough and futuristic…this is what Ford confidently decreed when they named their 2021 Vision Gran Turismo concept car the Team Fordzilla P1 by Ford, or Ford TFZ-P1. But while they were high fiving over a celebratory bratwurst, the name was really hitting the fan in Japan. “Fordzilla” is a portmanteau of Ford and Godzilla, which doesn’t match the car’s exterior design.
46: Li Shi Guang Ming Detroit Fish
This adult-sized version of the Little Tikes Cozy Coupe was proudly displayed at the 2008 Paris Auto Show as the Li Shi Guang Ming Detroit Fish. Glub glub.
47: Li Shi Guang Ming Chika
The name Chika has its roots in the old English word, Chic . After having done an image search of the word Chika in Google recently, I was horrified with a discovery of NSFW Content in the Google image list! Li Shi Guang Ming should have just left the electric microcar as the Li Shi Guang Ming Chic , and that would not have been such a problem.
48: Suzuki Mom’s Personal Wagon
This concept served as a preview for the second-generation Suzuki MR. Fortunately, when the production version arrived, Suzuki stuck with the ‘MR’ name.
49: MGA Developments Hotdog
In 1989, some time after Ford inflicted its third-generation Fiesta on an unsuspecting world, Coventry-based Design Consultancy MGA Developments Limited actually created something worse: the Hotdog - an open-topped, 2000s-styled version of the third-generation Fiesta. Strangely, it never made production.
50: Kia Habaniro
With a practical estate body, all-wheel drive and 2 electric motors, this car has a lot going for it, but it’s lumbered with a dreadful name. According to Kia, the Habaniro’s name is an pun of 1 word and a car model: HABAnero, and Kia NIRO. Could they not have picked out some different letters to make something a little better?
51: Nissan Teatro for Dayz
It may not look like a particularly long name, but just trying saying ‘Teatro for Days’ out loud. Bit of a mouthful, no? It’s also an excessively geeky name for an all-electric concept car.
52: Dodge Scooter
We have to wonder what other leaves the Dodge had on hand when they decided this open-topped version of the 2003 Dodge Razor should be named after a scooter. Oddly, it never got past the mockup stage.
53: Pontiac Aztek
The Aztek was a misshapen SUV-ish thing with a fittingly malformed name. It’s an ugly misspelling of “Aztec” for an ugly car.
54: VinFast Fadil
Surely VinFast must have known that by naming its Opel Karl-based hatchback ‘Fadil’, it’d be opening itself up to snide remarks from every corner of the motoring world. The Vietnamese firm recently pulled off the same trick with the new President.
Alrighty, that’s enough for now. I’m out of breath to continue. Will be releasing the last 6 worst car names of all time to this list sometime soon.
), which technically just gives you the duty to watch over peoples actions and do something about it.