Have you ever tried to come up with a name for a car? It may seem easy, but car brands actually spend quite some time looking for exciting, cool and stylish names to match their vehicles. And usually, they double-check if a name might have a different meaning in another language. Here are the last 20 hilarious examples of when they forgot to do that, or when the names got dreadfully long.
Continued from 40 Great Cars with Rubbish Names - Pt. 1.
21: Lincoln Continental Mark V Landau Four Door Hardtop
This car is fucking huge! And so is probably the badge with the name. But hey, at least they didn’t use any confusing abbreviations!
22: Dodge Dart Swinger
Built by Dodge as a turbocharged variant of the Dodge Dart (Classic) the V8-powered Dodge Dart Swinger was an ultra-luxurious muscle car with an ultra-radical performance rating. It was mass produced, with over 20,000 units sold in one year. This was a hip car to own when it was introduced at the end of the ’60s. Come the ’70s and it gave party guests the wrong impression. The keys were usually to be found in a bowl by the door…Uh, you might wanna sanitize its keys, who knows how many bowls they’ve been in?
23: BMW Individual 7 Series The Next 100 Years
A good name to begin with, but way too many name additions have been made to this special edition. It was never mass-produced, with only 100 units made. Good luck fitting this badge onto your tailgate…
24: Subaru Legacy Touring Bruce
Who thought that naming a car “Bruce” was ever a good idea?
25: Citroën C-Métisse
The Citroën C-Métisse Concept was unveiled at the 2006 Paris Autoshow. It is a hybrid shooting brake, and it can switch between FWD, RWD and AWD depending on the situation. The French word “Métisse” means “half-caste.” Unfortunately, it also means “bastard.”
26: Volkswagen Jetta
The Jetta is very unpopular in Germany (we only drive Golfs and Passats), but it’s pretty common in the rest of the world. But how about Italy? Well, no. Because sadly, the word “Jetta,” said in an Italian accent “Het-ta,” is perilously close to the Italian word “ietta”, which means “losing streak” or “streak of bad luck”.
27: Volkswagen Tiguan
A made up word that is hard to pronounce, sounds fucked up, and offers zero descriptive reference. The Volkswagen Touareg has a name that is easy to pronounce. Its slightly-smaller twin? Less so. The Tiguan’s name is a portmanteau of the words Tiger and Leguan, which translate in German to Tiger and Iguana. TIL…
28: Volkswagen Vento
The Vento was introduced in 1992 as the successor of the 2nd generation Jetta. Volkswagen wanted to change the image and increase the profit by changing the name, although they kept the Jetta name in the US and some other non-European countries as people were already used to it. The Jetta has been featured earlier on in this list, and apparently Volkswagen also fucked up the new name. “Vento” is indeed Italian for “wind”, but colloquially, that word is also used for a “wind” that comes from someone’s ass - so basically, the car is called “Volkswagen Fart”.
29: Volkswagen Touareg
Possibly one of the world’s greatest ethnic tribes, attached to an utter crapmobile with zero greatness. It’s like using the name “Super Sport” on a basic CUV.
30: Chevrolet Chevy II Nova
Main Article: 66 worst car names of all time - Part 2
Another example from the Spanish market, although this time it’s far less brutal: “Nova”, which was used by both Chevrolet and AvtoVAZ, simply translates into “it doesn’t go” (“no va”). The German Opel Nova managed to escape this fate, as it was sold as the Opel Corsa in the rest of the world.
31: Hyundai Kona
You might argue that most of the cars in this list are pretty old, and that the carmakers probably have learned their lesson. The 2017 Hyundai Kona proves the opposite: The car is supposed to be named after a faraway town located south of the Hawaii Islands, right beside Hilo. But said in a Spanish-Portuguese accent, “koo-na,” is perilously close to the Portuguese word “cona,” which is a rather derogatory expression for “female genitalia.”
To avert disaster in Portuguese markets, Hyundai Motor Company ditched the Kona name and resold the car as the Hyundai Kauai in Portugal. So don’t go around calling this a Hawaii Island’s car, or whatever, well…just because it’s called “Hawaii Island,” or, emm…“Havaà Ilsa.”
32: Buick LaCrosse
Not only was it weird to name a car after a Canadian sport and change the capitalizations, LaCrosse means to pleasure yourself in French-Canadian slang.
33: Isuzu TF
Main article: 66 worst car names of all time - Part 1
Yeah, I honestly don’t like Isuzu’s missteps here, but literally, TF sounds like “What The Fuck” on a truck.
34: Isuzu P’up
See above (13), but named after puppies. Arf Arf!
35: Nissan Rogue
An absolute monster of an off-roader, the Nissan Rogue, the American version of the Japanese Nissan X-Trail, has a rather fine name for Americans. However, what many people are blissfully unaware of is that Rogue, in a dictionary, means savage or destructive. Sounds like it’s gonna eat your soul.
36: Volkswagen Up!
I think Up! is a cute name for this tiny European city car. What bugs me is that VW insists on putting the exclamation point at the end, not only confounding autocorrect and spell checkers when I’m typing, but also making it seem like you’re always! excited! every time you write about the car.
37: Volkswagen Thing
In 1973 and 1974, Volkswagen decided that Americans were ready for the Volkswagen Type 181, a car that looked like a small child’s version of a toy jeep, and its open-topped, RWD American counterpart called the “Thing” was christened and offered for sale. Other names around the world weren’t so nondescript. In the UK it was called the Trekker, and in Mexico, it was the Safari. In Germany, it was the Kurierwagen.
Originally, the Thing was designed for German military use. It was a unique vehicle. The windows and doors could easily be removed. A drain in the floor made cleanup easy, with a hose. Its windshield folded down. Drawbacks? The engine only offered 55 hp and the top speed was 71 mph. Ironically, The Volkswagen Thing is now popular in the classic car market.
38: Proton Jebat
The Proton Jebat was unveiled at the 2010 Kuala Lumpur International Motor Show. Was it any legendary supercar? No. It was a Mitsubishi Lancer designed under Mitsubishi’s license. The name “Jebat” refers to a legendary warrior from Malacca called Hang Jebat. Sadly, it also means “fuck” in Croatian, so essentially, it’s called the “Proton Fucking.”
39: Mercedes-Benz Vaneo Ambiente Dog
The Mercedes-Benz Vaneo isn’t a minivan, as you may think. Instead, it is a minivan-ish Mini MPV, and it can, though small, fit 7 people in it. The term “Vaneo” means “sociable person,” but oddly, it also means “a person’s organs.” The craziest part is that when you bought a Mercedes-Benz Vaneo in the Ambiente trim with the optional Dog pack, you’d be the proud owner of the Mercedes-Benz Vaneo Ambiente Dog. Woof woof!
40: Ford Pinto
While the term “Pinto” may not seem so bad, as it means “baby chicken” or chick” in Portuguese, it is also a slang for “small male genitalia” in Brazil. Much like the way roosters are called cocks in the Americas…
And that’s the end of this list. Which one was the most hilarious? And which ones did I forget? Comment below! Be sure to drop a like and Stay tuned for more! Here’s a poll you can use to suggest which one you think is the worst.
- Lincoln Continental Landau Four Door Hardtop
- Dodge Dart Swinger
- BMW Individual 7 Series The Next 100 Years
- Subaru Legacy Touring Bruce
- Citroën C-Métisse
- Volkswagen Jetta
- Volkswagen Tiguan
- Volkswagen Vento
- Volkswagen Touareg
- Chevrolet Chevy II Nova
- Hyundai Kona
- Buick LaCrosse
- Isuzu TF
- Isuzu P’up
- Nissan Rogue
- Volkswagen Up!
- Volkswagen Thing
- Proton Jebat
- Mercedes-Benz Vaneo Ambiente Dog
- Ford Pinto