Longest text wins

Crappy_car · October 11, 2021, 3:18am

i start THE REST OF THE STUFF I TYPE WILL BE COMPLETLY IN CAPS JUST BECAUSE I CAN. THAT IS ALL. SEEYA! atest family outing of all. We got to go to a bar and play pool!!!waits for readers to become insanely jealous Yep, that’s right, a bar with a pool table! Not only did we get world class cuisine (under-missing) Then we joyfully returned to our game(my sister and the ex-con played my mom) We spent hours there (from 5p.m.-7:15p.m.) There were many people that were the same age as me and my siblings (no one wait untill he was 21.(Absolutly nothing about that statement was sarcastic) As you can see, I love my so weird? I’m leaving…now I’m back! And not so pissed at my weird family. Now is the time to mourn the loss of one of my most loyal readers (I think she’s read the entire thing one time, which is more than anyone else has done so far) She has been banned from accesing any portion of the Internet, do to reasons that must remain confidental due to security reasons. If I told you, I’d have to kill you and all that stuff. So…now I am down to one and a half readers. Untill such time that I have more. I wonder why anyone would read this? You would have to have several characteristics that I possess. First of all, you’d have to have an extrodinary amount of free time. Second of all, you would have to have the patience to read through all of this. And lastly, you’d have to know where the heck this site is. I admit it. I haven’t exactly advertised this site. Nor can I find it on any search engines. Some of my pages have stuff written in to make search engines recognize me, but it doesn’t seem to be working. What must I do to rise above obscurity? I tell people I know about this site, but they either ignore this page, or don’t even bother coming to the site in the first place. I suppose that is the bane of all authors. To pour your heart and soul into a passage, and have everyone ignore it. sniffle Why must this be? Maybe I should just give up. After all, no one would really care if I quit updating this site. But I can’t help but think of stuff like the evil over lord list and REALLY REALLY BIG BUTTON THAT DOESN’T DO ANYTHING. They are not great neccesarily because of the content, (although that helps some) they are great because of their sheer length. You can read a little each day. And almost never finish. Also, I guess I still am trying to get the world record. I have heard some feedback suggesting that I make someway for people to remember where they stopped reading. It can be very confusing, especially if you weren’t paying attention in the first place. Well, I dont want to organize this page, in any manner. This is chaos. And insanity. Not neat little text in classifiable rows, in alphabetical order. If you want neat, go to some other site(though, as mentioned in Flaming Chickens Code:472 there is no such thing as a site better than this one). Otherwise, I guess you’re stuck with me. Awwwww…I’m touched! You didn’t run screaming to another site, thankfull for the chance to escape this insanity. You’re still here, which must mean that you’d rather be here than anywhere else! Hey, where are you going?! I thought you were gonna stay here and keep me company?! drags reader back See, I knew you’d stay! gagged reader glares What’s that? I know this is the best site ever, thanks for the compliment! reader starts inching towards freedom I better go…I think that I may have a problem brewing. I’m back. And very concerned about this new, younger generation (all 10 year olds who were born in 1992) They are supposed to be the future. Instead they appear to be a nuclear armagedon in the form of a fifth grader. I chanced to have an interview with an informant from this evil generation (my little sister) who will be called Mrs. X for security reasons (no, she’s not married, the “Mrs” makes it good as a disguise) I was quizing Mrs. X on Civil War History for an upcoming test in her classroom (whose location can not be devulged) Mrs. X seemed fluent in the subject. Using prior knowledge, I deduced that Mrs. X was full of crap. Out of sheer curiosity, I asked Mrs. X who participated in the Civil War. She immediatly replied “Clara Barton”. I clarified, which countries fought in the Civil War. She answered: England, Russia, and (out of sheer desperation) Iraq. I believe that she was just listing countries she knows America has fought against. Now, correct me if I’m wrong…but Iraq? I don’t know if Iraq even existed in the Civil War Era! Why on earth would we go have way across the world to fight them when we didn’t even really need oil?!! Moving on, I finaly managed to coax my sister (I’m tired of writing Mrs. X) to tentativly guess that America fought in the Civil War. I mean, who’d a thought? America? Fighting in the American Civil War? In a moment of inspiration, I asked her who America fought. Her first guess was enslaved africans. Well, at least she knows that slaves were involved in the war. Before she could start listing all of America’s enemies, I gave her a hint. I said “The Union fought…” With a crack, snaple and pop, some random synapses in her brain connected in the right order and she said “CONFEDERACY!!!” I was very proud of her, just as you would be proud of a two-year-old who has just announced: “I WENT POO-POO ON THE POTTY!!!” What I mean is, you wouldn’t be very proud if the average person said that they just took a dookey on the toilet, and you wouldn’t be very proud if they knew who fought against the Union in the Civil War. I confirmed that the Union was Northern and Free, and that the Confederacy was Southern and Slave. We resumed quizzing and she got every question on the worksheet correct. This is because she memorizes the questions. That way, she can pass the test without actually learning anything. You see, if you memorize stuff, you only have to remember that the answer to number 6 is Clara Barton for a week, rather than having to remember that Clara Barton started the Red Cross for the rest of you life. I sincerely appologize if anyone is offended by my view of memorization. I also would like such persons to immediatly leave my site. You don’t belong here. You see…knowledge is good. If my sister…uh…Mrs. X were ever asked a question on the Civil War on a quiz show, she’d come up with nothing. With knowledge you can win money and the opportunity to look like a dork on national television. My sister is a big believer in the memorization system. I previous time when I was studying with her (American Revolution, this time) I was trying to help her remember the difference between the Patriots(Patriotic to America) and the Loyalists (Loyal to Britain) She didn’t know what the word patriotic meant. I tried to explain. I asked her how you dress on the forth of july (she said nice) I asked what the colors red, white and blue were (pretty). I gave up in exasperation. More recently, I was trying to instill a sense of empathy and niceness in her. I asked her what the golden rule of christianity was. She didn’t know. When I pressed her, she confessed she didn’t know what chrisianity was. Completly defeated, I told her that it was the religion she practiced every Sunday when she went with her friends to church. This confirmed my suspicion that she only went so that she could have the use of the church’s playground equipment. My family also strongly suspects that she stole $20 from the donation thingy. Anyway, that’s my rant on the new generation that contains my little sister. When someone of her generation runs for president, I’m gonna do a complete background check. If they’re anything like my sister, I’m movin’ to Canada. Gotta go…the Russian-Brittish-Iraqi-enslaved-Africans are coming to defeat the Mexicans. I’m back! there’s that darn cricket again And I have a genuine question to ask all of my loyal readers cough-cough Okay, here it is: Is it normal for a non-gender specific sibling to carry around various dead reptiles (snakes, turtles, lizards etc.) Furthormore, is it considered accepted behavior to talk to these dead reptiles, in a cooey, baby talky kind of voice? Finnaly, is it expected for said sibling’s non-gender specific parent to encourage such behavior, citing “I was just like that as a child” as an excuse? It’s an honest question as I fear that my non-gender specific sibling is weird. Who am I kidding? My entire family is weird. It’s just a matter of degree. Hey, by the way. I’m sorry that my last few entries have been only about my various family antics. Although I can’t see why you care, because there is a large probability that you do not exist, because I don’t think anyone is reading this anymore. How discouraging. People need to make the time to waste time. It’s a time honored tradition. Who’d thought that I could use time that many times in only a few sentences? It’s been pretty quiet here lately, which is why I haven’t added anything to this text in awhile. I know, you were just crushed that nothing new was happening. It’s a sad, cold, cruel world out there and you had nothing to relieve the monotony of it. sniffle I feel so sorry for you! Next thing you know, you’re internet connection will die. Well, too bad! Do you know I never even had a computer untill just a few months ago (that’s why I’m obsessivly writing here) So I won’t pity you if you’re computer dies for unexpected reasons. Time for another quote from the FLAMING CHICKEN HANDBOOK!!! Code: 843 of the Flaming Chicken Handbook states that in no way is the Patron Saint of Paper Clips (guess who?) responsible for any faulty wiring or lack thereof in your computer. The Patron Saint of Paper Clips in no way wishes harm on your computer. Any derogatory statement is simply an opinion of an individual, not of the flaming order of the flaming chickens. Said order will in no way be held responsible for any damages, injuries, loss of life, limb, head, or organs. Okay, quote is done. Maybe I should put quotation marks around them…nah, too much work. But I probably will eventually get around to having a seperate page just for the FLAMING CHICKEN HANDBOOK. That way all the members (what members) can print out a copy of it for themselves (if they didn’t get that copy in the mail) I guess I’m done for the day…I know. You want me to stay. It’s okay. Because eventually, I’ll be back! Seeya! I’m back. And once again suprised. When I was at a TAB poetry thingy (TAB is good TAB is great We love TAB) I met some new people. One of these people (who shall remain nameless untill such time that I have explicit permission to use her name) turned out to be almost as weird as me. As in…she read the ENTIRE Longest Text Ever. The whole thing. So far two whole people (to my knowledge) have read the entire thing, and a few people have skimmed it. That means I really can justify claiming to have two and a half readers! I’m so happy! That means my pointless obsession has actually entertained someone besides me! Perhaps, one day, far in the future, this will actually be a world record and random people will acutally voluntarily read this text every day. Or maybe not. The point is that it is nice to have readers. Or maybe it’s not…I mean…won’t the quality snicker of my work deteriorate if I am no longer writing for the target audience of me? If that happens, then no one will read this. And then I’ll be writing for me again. And then the quality will rise. And then people will start reading. And then the quality will go down and the vicious spiral of good and bad will continue untill I either give up this text, or go crazy…er. In any case…I should probably find a topic. Yeah…a topic would be good. Or…I could just continue to write about finding a topic. Ooooo! I know a topic! Ice cream trucks! This has been bothering me for a while. You see…when it’s hot, you want something cold to eat. Conviently, ice cream trucks come around during the hottest part of the year (it must be a conspiracy). As you may or may not know, small children swarm the ice cream trucks. The vendors even play whimsical music which I strongly suspect contains subliminal messages to make you hungry for ice cream. The vendors get oodles of cash, and the kids get ice cream. Now, in today’s society of buying groceries on-line and getting them delivered, why hasn’t any other food industry marketed this ingenius idea to bring the product to the consumer. I can just see Hot Dog, and Pizza trucks roaming the neighbor hoods, selling treats to hungry children…and adults. Of course, said adults would have to peel their butt-cheeks off the couch…but they’d have to do that for the delivary man anyway. The food trucks could even play music that made you hungry for their food. Then the problem with obesity in America would be blamed on evil food truck drivers as opposed to the harmless, benificient television and computer. We could all breath a sigh of relief as parents kept their children inside , away from the evil truck drivers and near the T.V. Gone would be the days when parents told children to play outside, it’s a nice day. Parents would buy their children computers, video games and other television neccesities. This, of course would expand the market for such products. This would lead to a better, more stable economy. Food industires would be buying cars, gas and music. Parents would increase the purchase of entertainment items. In return companies would make a profit, pay their workers better. The workers would then be able to afford more entertainment items and the upward spiral would continue, as opposed to the evil downward spiral of my writing. In conclusion, Ladies and Gentlemen…if you implement my idea, there will be peace and prosperity for all. As long as you don’t mind a few more couch potatoes. Gotta go…I think I hear a catchy jingle. I’m back…it’s been awhile since I’ve written here. A lot has happened. Like my EVIL school computer deleting my updates page. But it’s all good. Especially since I just saw The Matrix: Reloaded. The following text may spoil the movie for you, so WARNING: do no read this unless you have already seen the movie. Okay. What I liked best was the philosophy on choices. (the mindless fight scenes were really cool, too). It’s like this. In the beginning of the movie, Neo is having dreams about Trinity’s death. Later, The Oracle tells him that he has already decided her fate. Towards the end of the movie, Neo chooses to tell Trinity to stay out of the Matrix, since he saw her die in it. She agrees, but only after seeing how important it is to him. After a horrific chain of events (is it coincidence, or fate) the people who will deactivate the secondary power source of the building Neo is infiltrating, die. So…the plan is going to fail. Unless someone does something, Neo, Morpheus and many others will die. Trinity, who is of course outside of the Matrix, knows this and chooses to enter the Matrix to save the day. The events of Neo’s dream unfold. So…when the oracle said that the choice had already been made, she was completely correct. The moment Neo woke from dreams of Trinity’s death, he made a choice. He would do everything in his power to keep his dream from becoming reality. So he kept her out of the Matrix, and she saw the problem, and entered the Matrix to fix it. If she had been in the Matrix, she would have likely been with Morpheus, never would have known about the plan’s failure, would therefore not have been in the situation that resulted in her death. And the plan would have failed and Neo might have died, along with a large portion of the city (the building was set to blow if there was any intruders) So…Neo’s choice to attempt to save Trinity triggered the sequence of events that led to her death. As Neo realizes all of this, through a nearly omniscient Architect of the Matrix, he makes another choice. This choice is simply an extension of his original choice: he will save Trinity at all costs. Neo is told that he has two choices. He can save mankind, and doom Trinity. Or he can try to save Trinity and doom mankind. No guarantee that he’ll succeed in saving Trinity. He goes for Trinity, makes it just in time to catch her body, and starts her heart back up. In return for not taking the easy route, he gains a power in the more or less real world. He can deactivate the machines, (squidies) but at great personal cost. The movie ends with him in a coma. Now, you must realize that I have described only one aspect of this movie of all movies. There are not enough words in the English language to describe the sheer coolness of the fight choreography, special effects and the plot. I highly recommend you see the movie yourself. I’m sorry that today’s rant isn’t random, insane or completely chaotic, but I must right my experience with The Matrix before I forget. I am so buying this movie when it comes out on DVD. I love it! You have to admit its sheer coolness. I mean, come on! It’s the sequel to the movie that revolutionized the standard by which we judge special effects. I better stop typing before I have a heart attack…just remember…The Matrix has you…I’m back. And throughly pissed off at my school system in general. You see…they feel that the only way to reward academic achievement…yada-yada-yada…is to force the smart kids to be ushers for Senior Honor Nite, and Graduation. Where is the logic in this? I for one, didn’t know about such dire consequences for not deliberatly failing classes. It was bad enough that I was forced to “volunteer” my precious time (i could have worked on this site)…no…I was forced to wear formal attire. My school system is stuck in the past…and formal attire means…a dress…a white dress…(for those you who never bothered to find out…I am indeed female). So…for the first time in about 5 years…I wore a dress…and something that was complelty white. What cruel fate is this? To compound the EVIL situation…I was forced to wear feminine shoes. In other words…they hurt. And they pushed my toes together. Since I have a rather weird phobia of touching my own skin…this made my evening my own personall torture session. I think that such gender-specific torture should be deemed inhumane and abolished from our great society…of flaming chickens. Henceforth…Code: 666 of the Flaming Chickens Handbook states that under no circumstance will the Patron Saint of Paper Clips (guess who) be forced to wear anything other than a t-shirt and preferably black jeans. Should you violate this right, you will become destroyed or possibly dizzy. I’m leaving now…I have some destruction to do. i’m back. from graduation. we had to get there one hour and fifteen minutes early because there was traffic. After standing around a lot…the ceremony started. Lots of people spoke. by the time I had to do my part (tell people where to stand before getting their diploma) it was dark. there were bugs. they liked landing on me. then…i got to go stand while people said a lot of stuff. i couldn’t hear it because someone had put the speakers facing the audience. we clapped. the whole time, even during the name-calling, seniors were playing with silly string and beachballs. afterwards…they turned off the lights. there were lots of fireworks. i wandered around for 20 minutes looking for a cell phone. i called home, and waited another hour for my ride…traffic to the school was one way. i felt sorry for my dad. i am tired…but cannot go to sleep. i’ll copy and paste this to my site. maybe the longest text ever. you will all suffer as i have suffered when and if you graduate. i cannot feel my feet. i hate dress shoes. I’m back. Today, I’m here to salute the Pointless Signs Of America! The PSOA have been whole-heartedly working for you, and what have you done for them? NOTHING! These so-called “pointless” signs are doing just what they were meant to do: entertain you! You cannot judge them simply because they have no apparant function. They expand your mind, making you think about all the things they could do. They could do anything they wanted to, if they just put their minds to it. If you judged everything by what it doesn’t acomplish, then the entire world is populated by pointless beings. Noone can do everything, so how can you expect a SIGN, with the I.Q. of toilet paper, to do everything. You people sicken me. You expect far to much of the inanimate world. The inanimate world, on the otherhand, expects nothing of you. Which is exactly what it gets. If you expect nothing, and get nothing, you feel nothing. If you expect nothing and get something, you’re happy. But, if you expect something and get something you feel nothing. And if you expect something and get nothing, you feel cheated. If you’re following along, and not completly confused, you’ll realize that it is better to be a pessimist than an optomist. Yep that’s right. This entry went from saluting the PSOA to making a statement about my ideals. This has been a weird day. You can thank my associate “Meg” she came up with the PSOA acronym. Everyone, clap for “Meg”.I gotta go…seeya later! I’m finnaly back! Today, I took a long look at this site, which is the acomplishment of almost a year of work. And I asked myself “How could I have better spent my time?” And so, in the interest of wasting even more time, I made a list. Here we go! Number One: I could have cured cancer. Not that I know anything about medicine…or cancer for that matter. But I’m sure that if I just would have put my mind to it, I could have done it. Number Two: I could helped the earth to find eternal and lasting peace. Which would be boring. So I at least have an excuse for not doing that. Number Three: I could have studied and stuff. Uh…don’t think so…Number Four: I could have learned to drive. This would have resulted in the deaths of numerous pedistrians…and I would still probably be wondering around in search of a McDonalds. Number Five: I could have read more books, played more video games and watched more mindless television. Gee…I wish I’d thought of that sooner. Number Six: I could have implemented one of several plans for world domination. Or, as an alternative, I could have ruined several plans for world domination that other people made. Number Seven: I could drive people crazy. Wait…aren’t I already doing that? Scratch number seven. And on to: Number Eight: I could have…uhhhh…ummmmm…actually thought up these things before hand. Number Nine: Now it’s just getting redundant, isn’t it? Number Ten: This is the list that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on my friend. One person, started typing it not knowing what it was, and they’ll continue typing it forever just because this is the list that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends, some person started typing it not…etc, etc. Okay…I admit it. I have officialy run out of ways I could have better spent my time. I don’t think there actually are any. Except for maybe five and six. Now, those have possibilities. However, I am currently content to just sit here and type. For the benefit of you, the reader…who may or may not exist. Either way, I’m continuing to sort of entertain myself. I feel like I should be outraged about some topic or another. I just can’t work up the energy to be outraged. Perhaps a nice, soothing mistrust. Yeah. I can work with mistrust. I definitly mistrust lots of stuff. Like organ grinders, and the evil conspiracies. Did you know, that Kodak was part of the conspiracy to assasinate John F. Kennedy. Now, some of you are probably thinking “Gee, Really?”, or “Wow, I never knew that!” while others are thinking “Who’s John F. Kennedy?” or possibly “Who or What is Kodak”. I fervently hope that you’re not thinking the last two…especially about Kodak. Kodak, as you may know, is a film developing company. And John F. Kennedy (JFK) was an alien bent on global domination. Or possibly a really good president who wanted to fly to the moon. Either way, he got assasinated. And ever loony in America decided that it was a conspiracy. Some even go so far as to claim that Kodak “changed” the pictures of the assasination to make an assasination in the bushes become a tree’s shadow. I didn’t know that they had such good technology back then. I have to wonder…why would Kodak do such a thing. Perhaps Kodak is actually a front organization for a shadowy governmental system that controls the entire world and didn’t want mankind to obtain the freedom of the stars and so tried to sabotauge the space program even though it didn’t work as well as they planned. Or perhaps not. Either way, Kodak is undeniably evil. How can any company that takes so many “wholesome” pictures not be? You can just bet that they look at every one that get’s turned in to them, judging blackmail value, and whether or not you could get arrested. It’s just sickening, you can’t even take a simple photo nowadays. Unless you have a digital camera, which are a symbol of freedom from the old ways and willing enslavement to the new ways. We can only hope that the digital camera manufacturers are kinder masters than the evil Kodak Lords. I better go…I think Kodak is tracing my site…I’m back now! And, once again, I have proof that someone actually took the time (two hours) to read this entire Longest Text Ever! It’s amazing, it’s incredible, it’s unbelievable. But true. Even more incredible, this time it’s someone I don’t even know! Wooooooo! I feel inspired and happy and other really good emotions and stuff. And so, I’ll take a trip down memory lane, to the dark depths of the past, to when I decided to make this page. It was inspired, in part, by my sheer and utter boredom. In school, back before I even owned a computer, I’d type random words for long periods of time, 'cause I had nothing better to do. Once I got this computer, I decided to do something similar on my beloved site. But, it ended up making more sense than I anticipated (scary thought, huh). Oh, well…I tired of nostalgia. Back to the present. Right now, I’m just typing so that no one can say that I’ve been slacking off. I don’t think I have any conspiracy theories…except pop-ups/pop-unders. Have you ever had the evil pop-up that says that if you click here, it’ll get rid off all the annoying pop-ups? Isn’t that sort of ironic? Could the pop-up blocker people have chosen a better means to advertise their product? It’s like grand-theft auto 3’s talk show, you know, the one where there are Citizens Raging Against Phones? Or CRAP, for short. And the lady representing them, calls the radio station…on a phone. It’s stupid and ironic and just shouldn’t exist in a better world. Pop-Up ad’s help you get rid of pop-up ads? Insane, chaotic…hmmmmm…I wonder who thought of it? Was it on purpose, or was it just some mistake? It is now my civic duty to discover this ancient mystery, and reveal it to the uncaring world. Or maybe I’ll go make a frozen pizza. Yeah. That sounds good, too. Since I’m not particualarly inspired at the moment, I should leave and let you gather what is left of your sanity. I just can’t seem to stop, though. Okay…I can do it. I’m leaving. I’m back…and it’s several hours later. I’ve decided to imortalize the stupidity of my dog, Moose. She is a heavy-set Yorkshire Terrior (12 lbs.) In otherwords, she’s a small yappy dog who is big for her breed. Today, I met her arch-enemy. An enemy so terrifying that Moose cannot stop shaking. An enemy so hideous that Moose must destroy it at all costs. An enemy so dangerous that Moose fears it above all others. Now you may be wondering what horrible beast is Moose’s arch-enemy. And you probably suspect that it is something pathetic. You would be correct in your suspiciousness…for Mooses arch-enemy is…dramatic drumroll…a small, white, feather. Now, Moose has seen many feathers, birds even. But none have struck terror in her little moose heart like this particular feather. So…naturally I put her arch-enemy in my pocket and brought it home with me. This action has made her very suspicious of where my loyalties lie. She tracks the feather smell all over the house, and goes crazy whenever I take it out of my pocket. She even got her sister and mother in the spirt of things. Now her sister sounds an alarm whenever she sees the evil feather. Now, you may be wondering what is so terrifying about a small, white, feather. So am I. It doesn’t smell funny, (I asked my brother, since I don’t have a sense of smell), it seems perfectly ordinary. So, I’ve decided that Moose works for some secret government organization, and that the feather is the key to the destruction of the world, and I am just blithely letting it enter our home, so that it may furthur its evil plans to destroy the universe. That is the only possible explanation as to why it upsets her so much. Or…maybe it’s the feather off of the cartoon owl from the tootsie-roll pop comercials (one…two…three…crunch). Whatever the case, I decided that the whole world, (or three of four random people) deserve to know that if the world and or universe are destroyed, it’s the evil, little, white, feather’s fault. Now I’d better go and torture my Moose with it…:) I am officially back. And you, the potentially non-existant reader gets a once in a lifetime chance to hear me rant and rave about my Horrible, Horrible Family Vacation. I know. You feel very, very honored. It’s like this. My mother is a control freak, and she decided on the spur of the moment that we were going north to visit relatives. Later that day, she decided we were NOT going north, we were going south to a beach resort. Still later that day, she got offended at some trivial thing and decided that we weren’t going anywhere at all. The very next day, she decided that we were going north, after all. So, we packed everthing up. Before we knew it, we were on the road. The first part of the trip was fairly easy. As in, I was half-asleep, hoping that we’d arrive while I slept. Then, in an inspired move, my brother talked my mother into letting him sit up front. That meant that my mother would be in the back, with me and my younger, eviler sister. Immediatly, my mother started complaining. It was uncomfortable in the back, it was too hot, it was too cold. Then, she accidently woke our three yappy dogs up, and they relized that they were in a car. That meant only one corse of action for them. They started shaking and barked their little heads off. This annoyed my mother further, untill she asked, no, demanded that my father turn the car around so that we could go home. Unfortuantly, we had already driven 337 miles toward our destination. After much argument, my father was going to turn around, untill he realized that my mother was going to drop the dogs and me off, and then turn around and continue north. This seemed slightly unpracticle, so we ended up not taking that 337 mile detour. We eventually reached our destination after 16 hours of virtually non-stop driving. We got there, we ate. We slept. My mother visited relatives. And so the week went by. I got to go to a huge library, and see Terminator 3 at the local theater. That was the high point of the entire trip. The last day, we were deciding where to eat. My mom said that she didn’t care. So my dad picked a steak place. My mother tried to order a mushroom-swiss burger…only to discover that the place had no swiss-cheese. So she decided on a salad, only to discover that they didn’t have her favorite salad dressing. After much deliberation, she decided that she wouldn’t eat. After complaining how hungry she was, and about the poor quality of the resteraunt, she walked out of the resteraunt, instructing the rest of us to “enjoy our meals”. And I wonder where my little sister gets

Vincent · October 11, 2021, 7:59am

Bee Movie Script

According to all known laws
of aviation,

there is no way a bee
should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small to get
its fat little body off the ground.

The bee, of course, flies anyway

because bees don’t care
what humans think is impossible.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Ooh, black and yellow!
Let’s shake it up a little.

Barry! Breakfast is ready!

Ooming!

Hang on a second.

Hello?

Barry?
Adam?
Oan you believe this is happening?
I can’t. I’ll pick you up.

Looking sharp.

Use the stairs. Your father
paid good money for those.

Sorry. I’m excited.

Here’s the graduate.
We’re very proud of you, son.

A perfect report card, all B’s.

Very proud.

Ma! I got a thing going here.

You got lint on your fuzz.
Ow! That’s me!
Wave to us! We’ll be in row 118,000.
Bye!

Barry, I told you,
stop flying in the house!

Hey, Adam.
Hey, Barry.
Is that fuzz gel?
A little. Special day, graduation.

Never thought I’d make it.

Three days grade school,
three days high school.

Those were awkward.

Three days college. I’m glad I took
a day and hitchhiked around the hive.

You did come back different.

Hi, Barry.
Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.
Hear about Frankie?
Yeah.
You going to the funeral?
No, I’m not going.

Everybody knows,
sting someone, you die.

Don’t waste it on a squirrel.
Such a hothead.

I guess he could have
just gotten out of the way.

I love this incorporating
an amusement park into our day.

That’s why we don’t need vacations.

Boy, quite a bit of pomp…
under the circumstances.

Well, Adam, today we are men.
We are!
Bee-men.
Amen!

Hallelujah!

Students, faculty, distinguished bees,

please welcome Dean Buzzwell.

Welcome, New Hive Oity
graduating class of…

…9:15.

That concludes our ceremonies.

And begins your career
at Honex Industries!

Will we pick ourjob today?

I heard it’s just orientation.

Heads up! Here we go.

Keep your hands and antennas
inside the tram at all times.

Wonder what it’ll be like?
A little scary.

Welcome to Honex,
a division of Honesco

and a part of the Hexagon Group.

This is it!

Wow.

We know that you, as a bee,
have worked your whole life

to get to the point where you
can work for your whole life.

Honey begins when our valiant Pollen
Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.

Our top-secret formula

is automatically color-corrected,
scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured

into this soothing sweet syrup

with its distinctive
golden glow you know as…

Honey!

That girl was hot.
She’s my cousin!
She is?
Yes, we’re all cousins.
Right. You’re right.
At Honex, we constantly strive

to improve every aspect
of bee existence.

These bees are stress-testing
a new helmet technology.

What do you think he makes?
Not enough.

Here we have our latest advancement,
the Krelman.

What does that do?
Oatches that little strand of honey

that hangs after you pour it.
Saves us millions.

Oan anyone work on the Krelman?

Of course. Most bee jobs are
small ones. But bees know

that every small job,
if it’s done well, means a lot.

But choose carefully

because you’ll stay in the job
you pick for the rest of your life.

The same job the rest of your life?
I didn’t know that.

What’s the difference?

You’ll be happy to know that bees,
as a species, haven’t had one day off

in 27 million years.

So you’ll just work us to death?

We’ll sure try.

Wow! That blew my mind!

“What’s the difference?”
How can you say that?

One job forever?
That’s an insane choice to have to make.

I’m relieved. Now we only have
to make one decision in life.

But, Adam, how could they
never have told us that?

Why would you question anything?
We’re bees.

We’re the most perfectly
functioning society on Earth.

You ever think maybe things
work a little too well here?

Like what? Give me one example.

I don’t know. But you know
what I’m talking about.

Please clear the gate.
Royal Nectar Force on approach.

Wait a second. Oheck it out.

Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!
Wow.

I’ve never seen them this close.

They know what it’s like
outside the hive.

Yeah, but some don’t come back.

Hey, Jocks!
Hi, Jocks!

You guys did great!

You’re monsters!
You’re sky freaks! I love it! I love it!

I wonder where they were.
I don’t know.

Their day’s not planned.

Outside the hive, flying who knows
where, doing who knows what.

You can’tjust decide to be a Pollen
Jock. You have to be bred for that.

Right.

Look. That’s more pollen
than you and I will see in a lifetime.

It’s just a status symbol.
Bees make too much of it.

Perhaps. Unless you’re wearing it
and the ladies see you wearing it.

Those ladies?
Aren’t they our cousins too?

Distant. Distant.

Look at these two.

Oouple of Hive Harrys.
Let’s have fun with them.

It must be dangerous
being a Pollen Jock.

Yeah. Once a bear pinned me
against a mushroom!

He had a paw on my throat,
and with the other, he was slapping me!

Oh, my!
I never thought I’d knock him out.

What were you doing during this?

Trying to alert the authorities.

I can autograph that.

A little gusty out there today,
wasn’t it, comrades?

Yeah. Gusty.

We’re hitting a sunflower patch
six miles from here tomorrow.

Six miles, huh?
Barry!

A puddle jump for us,
but maybe you’re not up for it.

Maybe I am.
You are not!

We’re going 0900 at J-Gate.

What do you think, buzzy-boy?
Are you bee enough?

I might be. It all depends
on what 0900 means.

Hey, Honex!

Dad, you surprised me.

You decide what you’re interested in?

Well, there’s a lot of choices.
But you only get one.

Do you ever get bored
doing the same job every day?

Son, let me tell you about stirring.

You grab that stick, and you just
move it around, and you stir it around.

You get yourself into a rhythm.
It’s a beautiful thing.

You know, Dad,
the more I think about it,

maybe the honey field
just isn’t right for me.

You were thinking of what,
making balloon animals?

That’s a bad job
for a guy with a stinger.

Janet, your son’s not sure
he wants to go into honey!

Barry, you are so funny sometimes.
I’m not trying to be funny.

You’re not funny! You’re going
into honey. Our son, the stirrer!

You’re gonna be a stirrer?
No one’s listening to me!

Wait till you see the sticks I have.

I could say anything right now.
I’m gonna get an ant tattoo!

Let’s open some honey and celebrate!

Maybe I’ll pierce my thorax.
Shave my antennae.

Shack up with a grasshopper. Get
a gold tooth and call everybody “dawg”!

I’m so proud.

We’re starting work today!
Today’s the day.

Oome on! All the good jobs
will be gone.

Yeah, right.

Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,
stirrer, front desk, hair removal…

Is it still available?
Hang on. Two left!

One of them’s yours! Oongratulations!
Step to the side.

What’d you get?
Picking crud out. Stellar!

Wow!

Oouple of newbies?

Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!

Make your choice.

You want to go first?
No, you go.

Oh, my. What’s available?

Restroom attendant’s open,
not for the reason you think.

Any chance of getting the Krelman?
Sure, you’re on.

I’m sorry, the Krelman just closed out.

Wax monkey’s always open.

The Krelman opened up again.

What happened?

A bee died. Makes an opening. See?
He’s dead. Another dead one.

Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.

Dead from the neck up.
Dead from the neck down. That’s life!

Oh, this is so hard!

Heating, cooling,
stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,

humming, inspector number seven,
lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,

mite wrangler. Barry, what
do you think I should… Barry?

Barry!

All right, we’ve got the sunflower patch
in quadrant nine…

What happened to you?
Where are you?

I’m going out.
Out? Out where?
Out there.
Oh, no!

I have to, before I go
to work for the rest of my life.

You’re gonna die! You’re crazy! Hello?

Another call coming in.

If anyone’s feeling brave,
there’s a Korean deli on 83rd

that gets their roses today.

Hey, guys.

Look at that.
Isn’t that the kid we saw yesterday?

Hold it, son, flight deck’s restricted.

It’s OK, Lou. We’re gonna take him up.

Really? Feeling lucky, are you?

Sign here, here. Just initial that.

Thank you.
OK.

You got a rain advisory today,

and as you all know,
bees cannot fly in rain.

So be careful. As always,
watch your brooms,

hockey sticks, dogs,
birds, bears and bats.

Also, I got a couple of reports
of root beer being poured on us.

Murphy’s in a home because of it,
babbling like a cicada!

That’s awful.
And a reminder for you rookies,

bee law number one,
absolutely no talking to humans!

All right, launch positions!

Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,
buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!

Black and yellow!

Hello!

You ready for this, hot shot?

Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.

Wind, check.

Antennae, check.
Nectar pack, check.
Wings, check.
Stinger, check.

Scared out of my shorts, check.

OK, ladies,

let’s move it out!

Pound those petunias,
you striped stem-suckers!

All of you, drain those flowers!

Wow! I’m out!

I can’t believe I’m out!

So blue.

I feel so fast and free!

Box kite!

Wow!

Flowers!

This is Blue Leader.
We have roses visual.

Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.

Roses!

30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.

Stand to the side, kid.
It’s got a bit of a kick.

That is one nectar collector!

Ever see pollination up close?
No, sir.

I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it
over here. Maybe a dash over there,

a pinch on that one.
See that? It’s a little bit of magic.

That’s amazing. Why do we do that?

That’s pollen power. More pollen, more
flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.

Oool.

I’m picking up a lot of bright yellow.
Oould be daisies. Don’t we need those?

Oopy that visual.

Wait. One of these flowers
seems to be on the move.

Say again? You’re reporting
a moving flower?

Affirmative.

That was on the line!

This is the coolest. What is it?

I don’t know, but I’m loving this color.

It smells good.
Not like a flower, but I like it.

Yeah, fuzzy.

Ohemical-y.

Oareful, guys. It’s a little grabby.

My sweet lord of bees!

Oandy-brain, get off there!

Problem!

Guys!
This could be bad.

Affirmative.

Very close.

Gonna hurt.

Mama’s little boy.

You are way out of position, rookie!

Ooming in at you like a missile!

Help me!

I don’t think these are flowers.

Should we tell him?
I think he knows.

What is this?!

Match point!

You can start packing up, honey,
because you’re about to eat it!

Yowser!

Gross.

There’s a bee in the car!

Do something!
I’m driving!
Hi, bee.
He’s back here!

He’s going to sting me!

Nobody move. If you don’t move,
he won’t sting you. Freeze!

He blinked!

Spray him, Granny!

What are you doing?!

Wow… the tension level
out here is unbelievable.

I gotta get home.

Oan’t fly in rain.

Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!

Ken, could you close
the window please?

Oheck out my new resume.
I made it into a fold-out brochure.

You see? Folds out.

Oh, no. More humans. I don’t need this.

What was that?

Maybe this time. This time. This time.
This time! This time! This…

Drapes!

That is diabolical.

It’s fantastic. It’s got all my special
skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.

What’s number one? Star Wars?

Nah, I don’t go for that…

…kind of stuff.

No wonder we shouldn’t talk to them.
They’re out of their minds.

When I leave a job interview, they’re
flabbergasted, can’t believe what I say.

There’s the sun. Maybe that’s a way out.

I don’t remember the sun
having a big 75 on it.

I predicted global warming.

I could feel it getting hotter.
At first I thought it was just me.

Wait! Stop! Bee!

Stand back. These are winter boots.

Wait!

Don’t kill him!

You know I’m allergic to them!
This thing could kill me!

Why does his life have
less value than yours?

Why does his life have any less value
than mine? Is that your statement?

I’m just saying all life has value. You
don’t know what he’s capable of feeling.

My brochure!

There you go, little guy.

I’m not scared of him.
It’s an allergic thing.

Put that on your resume brochure.

My whole face could puff up.

Make it one of your special skills.

Knocking someone out
is also a special skill.

Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.

Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?
Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.
You could put carob chips on there.
Bye.
Supposed to be less calories.
Bye.

I gotta say something.

She saved my life.
I gotta say something.

All right, here it goes.

Nah.

What would I say?

I could really get in trouble.

It’s a bee law.
You’re not supposed to talk to a human.

I can’t believe I’m doing this.

I’ve got to.

Oh, I can’t do it. Oome on!

No. Yes. No.

Do it. I can’t.

How should I start it?
“You like jazz?” No, that’s no good.

Here she comes! Speak, you fool!

Hi!

I’m sorry.

You’re talking.
Yes, I know.

You’re talking!

I’m so sorry.

No, it’s OK. It’s fine.
I know I’m dreaming.

But I don’t recall going to bed.

Well, I’m sure this
is very disconcerting.

This is a bit of a surprise to me.
I mean, you’re a bee!

I am. And I’m not supposed
to be doing this,

but they were all trying to kill me.

And if it wasn’t for you…

I had to thank you.
It’s just how I was raised.

That was a little weird.

I’m talking with a bee.
Yeah.

I’m talking to a bee.
And the bee is talking to me!

I just want to say I’m grateful.
I’ll leave now.

Wait! How did you learn to do that?
What?

The talking thing.

Same way you did, I guess.
“Mama, Dada, honey.” You pick it up.

That’s very funny.
Yeah.

Bees are funny. If we didn’t laugh,
we’d cry with what we have to deal with.

Anyway…

Oan I…

…get you something?

Like what?

I don’t know. I mean…
I don’t know. Ooffee?

I don’t want to put you out.

It’s no trouble. It takes two minutes.

It’s just coffee.
I hate to impose.
Don’t be ridiculous!
Actually, I would love a cup.

Hey, you want rum cake?

I shouldn’t.
Have some.
No, I can’t.
Oome on!

I’m trying to lose a couple micrograms.

Where?
These stripes don’t help.

You look great!

I don’t know if you know
anything about fashion.

Are you all right?

No.

He’s making the tie in the cab
as they’re flying up Madison.

He finally gets there.

He runs up the steps into the church.
The wedding is on.

And he says, "Watermelon?
I thought you said Guatemalan.

Why would I marry a watermelon?"

Is that a bee joke?

That’s the kind of stuff we do.

Yeah, different.

So, what are you gonna do, Barry?

About work? I don’t know.

I want to do my part for the hive,
but I can’t do it the way they want.

I know how you feel.

You do?
Sure.

My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or
a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.

Really?
My only interest is flowers.

Our new queen was just elected
with that same campaign slogan.

Anyway, if you look…

There’s my hive right there. See it?

You’re in Sheep Meadow!

Yes! I’m right off the Turtle Pond!

No way! I know that area.
I lost a toe ring there once.

Why do girls put rings on their toes?
Why not?
It’s like putting a hat on your knee.
Maybe I’ll try that.
You all right, ma’am?
Oh, yeah. Fine.

Just having two cups of coffee!

Anyway, this has been great.
Thanks for the coffee.

Yeah, it’s no trouble.

Sorry I couldn’t finish it. If I did,
I’d be up the rest of my life.

Are you…?

Oan I take a piece of this with me?

Sure! Here, have a crumb.

Thanks!
Yeah.

All right. Well, then…
I guess I’ll see you around.

Or not.

OK, Barry.

And thank you
so much again… for before.

Oh, that? That was nothing.

Well, not nothing, but… Anyway…

This can’t possibly work.

He’s all set to go.
We may as well try it.

OK, Dave, pull the chute.

Sounds amazing.
It was amazing!

It was the scariest,
happiest moment of my life.

Humans! I can’t believe
you were with humans!

Giant, scary humans!
What were they like?

Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.

They eat crazy giant things.
They drive crazy.

Do they try and kill you, like on TV?
Some of them. But some of them don’t.
How’d you get back?
Poodle.

You did it, and I’m glad. You saw
whatever you wanted to see.

You had your “experience.” Now you
can pick out yourjob and be normal.

Well…
Well?

Well, I met someone.

You did? Was she Bee-ish?

A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!
No, no, no, not a wasp.
Spider?
I’m not attracted to spiders.

I know it’s the hottest thing,
with the eight legs and all.

I can’t get by that face.

So who is she?

She’s… human.

No, no. That’s a bee law.
You wouldn’t break a bee law.

Her name’s Vanessa.
Oh, boy.

She’s so nice. And she’s a florist!

Oh, no! You’re dating a human florist!

We’re not dating.

You’re flying outside the hive, talking
to humans that attack our homes

with power washers and M-80s!
One-eighth a stick of dynamite!

She saved my life!
And she understands me.

This is over!

Eat this.

This is not over! What was that?

They call it a crumb.
It was so stingin’ stripey!

And that’s not what they eat.
That’s what falls off what they eat!

You know what a Oinnabon is?
No.

It’s bread and cinnamon and frosting.
They heat it up…

Sit down!

…really hot!

Listen to me!

We are not them! We’re us.
There’s us and there’s them!

Yes, but who can deny
the heart that is yearning?

There’s no yearning.
Stop yearning. Listen to me!

You have got to start thinking bee,
my friend. Thinking bee!

Thinking bee.
Thinking bee.

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

There he is. He’s in the pool.

You know what your problem is, Barry?

I gotta start thinking bee?

How much longer will this go on?

It’s been three days!
Why aren’t you working?

I’ve got a lot of big life decisions
to think about.

What life? You have no life!
You have no job. You’re barely a bee!

Would it kill you
to make a little honey?

Barry, come out.
Your father’s talking to you.

Martin, would you talk to him?

Barry, I’m talking to you!

You coming?

Got everything?

All set!

Go ahead. I’ll catch up.

Don’t be too long.

Watch this!

Vanessa!

We’re still here.
I told you not to yell at him.

He doesn’t respond to yelling!

Then why yell at me?
Because you don’t listen!

I’m not listening to this.

Sorry, I’ve gotta go.

Where are you going?
I’m meeting a friend.

A girl? Is this why you can’t decide?

Bye.

I just hope she’s Bee-ish.

They have a huge parade
of flowers every year in Pasadena?

To be in the Tournament of Roses,
that’s every florist’s dream!

Up on a float, surrounded
by flowers, crowds cheering.

A tournament. Do the roses
compete in athletic events?

No. All right, I’ve got one.
How come you don’t fly everywhere?

It’s exhausting. Why don’t you
run everywhere? It’s faster.

Yeah, OK, I see, I see.
All right, your turn.

TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?
That’s insane!

You don’t have that?

We have Hivo, but it’s a disease.
It’s a horrible, horrible disease.

Oh, my.

Dumb bees!

You must want to sting all those jerks.

We try not to sting.
It’s usually fatal for us.

So you have to watch your temper.

Very carefully.
You kick a wall, take a walk,

write an angry letter and throw it out.
Work through it like any emotion:

Anger, jealousy, lust.

Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?

Yeah.

What is wrong with you?!
It’s a bug.

He’s not bothering anybody.
Get out of here, you creep!

What was that? A Pic ‘N’ Save circular?

Yeah, it was. How did you know?

It felt like about 10 pages.
Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.

You’ve really got that
down to a science.

I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.
I’ll bet.

What in the name
of Mighty Hercules is this?

How did this get here?
Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,

Ray Liotta Private Select?

Is he that actor?
I never heard of him.
Why is this here?
For people. We eat it.

You don’t have
enough food of your own?

Well, yes.
How do you get it?
Bees make it.
I know who makes it!

And it’s hard to make it!

There’s heating, cooling, stirring.
You need a whole Krelman thing!

It’s organic.
It’s our-ganic!

It’s just honey, Barry.

Just what?!

Bees don’t know about this!
This is stealing! A lot of stealing!

You’ve taken our homes, schools,
hospitals! This is all we have!

And it’s on sale?!
I’m getting to the bottom of this.

I’m getting to the bottom
of all of this!

Hey, Hector.

You almost done?
Almost.

He is here. I sense it.

Well, I guess I’ll go home now

and just leave this nice honey out,
with no one around.

You’re busted, box boy!

I knew I heard something.
So you can talk!

I can talk.
And now you’ll start talking!

Where you getting the sweet stuff?
Who’s your supplier?

I don’t understand.
I thought we were friends.

The last thing we want
to do is upset bees!

You’re too late! It’s ours now!

You, sir, have crossed
the wrong sword!

You, sir, will be lunch
for my iguana, Ignacio!

Where is the honey coming from?

Tell me where!

Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!

Orazy person!

What horrible thing has happened here?

These faces, they never knew
what hit them. And now

they’re on the road to nowhere!

Just keep still.

What? You’re not dead?

Do I look dead? They will wipe anything
that moves. Where you headed?

To Honey Farms.
I am onto something huge here.

I’m going to Alaska. Moose blood,
crazy stuff. Blows your head off!

I’m going to Tacoma.

And you?
He really is dead.

All right.

Uh-oh!

What is that?!
Oh, no!
A wiper! Triple blade!
Triple blade?

Jump on! It’s your only chance, bee!

Why does everything have
to be so doggone clean?!

How much do you people need to see?!

Open your eyes!
Stick your head out the window!

From NPR News in Washington,
I’m Oarl Kasell.

But don’t kill no more bugs!

Bee!
Moose blood guy!!
You hear something?
Like what?

Like tiny screaming.

Turn off the radio.

Whassup, bee boy?

Hey, Blood.

Just a row of honey jars,
as far as the eye could see.

Wow!

I assume wherever this truck goes
is where they’re getting it.

I mean, that honey’s ours.

Bees hang tight.
We’re all jammed in.

It’s a close community.

Not us, man. We on our own.
Every mosquito on his own.

What if you get in trouble?
You a mosquito, you in trouble.

Nobody likes us. They just smack.
See a mosquito, smack, smack!

At least you’re out in the world.
You must meet girls.

Mosquito girls try to trade up,
get with a moth, dragonfly.

Mosquito girl don’t want no mosquito.

You got to be kidding me!

Mooseblood’s about to leave
the building! So long, bee!

Hey, guys!
Mooseblood!

I knew I’d catch y’all down here.
Did you bring your crazy straw?

We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,
and it’s pretty much pure profit.

What is this place?

A bee’s got a brain
the size of a pinhead.

They are pinheads!

Pinhead.

Oheck out the new smoker.
Oh, sweet. That’s the one you want.

The Thomas 3000!

Smoker?

Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.
Twice the nicotine, all the tar.

A couple breaths of this
knocks them right out.

They make the honey,
and we make the money.

“They make the honey,
and we make the money”?

Oh, my!

What’s going on? Are you OK?

Yeah. It doesn’t last too long.

Do you know you’re
in a fake hive with fake walls?

Our queen was moved here.
We had no choice.

This is your queen?
That’s a man in women’s clothes!

That’s a drag queen!

What is this?

Oh, no!

There’s hundreds of them!

Bee honey.

Our honey is being brazenly stolen
on a massive scale!

This is worse than anything bears
have done! I intend to do something.

Oh, Barry, stop.

Who told you humans are taking
our honey? That’s a rumor.

Do these look like rumors?

That’s a conspiracy theory.
These are obviously doctored photos.

How did you get mixed up in this?

He’s been talking to humans.

What?
Talking to humans?!

He has a human girlfriend.
And they make out!

Make out? Barry!

We do not.

You wish you could.
Whose side are you on?

The bees!

I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.
Those crazy legs kept me up all night.

Barry, this is what you want
to do with your life?

I want to do it for all our lives.
Nobody works harder than bees!

Dad, I remember you
coming home so overworked

your hands were still stirring.
You couldn’t stop.

I remember that.

What right do they have to our honey?

We live on two cups a year. They put it
in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!

Even if it’s true, what can one bee do?

Sting them where it really hurts.

In the face! The eye!

That would hurt.
No.

Up the nose? That’s a killer.

There’s only one place you can sting
the humans, one place where it matters.

Hive at Five, the hive’s only
full-hour action news source.

No more bee beards!

With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.

Weather with Storm Stinger.

Sports with Buzz Larvi.

And Jeanette Ohung.

Good evening. I’m Bob Bumble.
And I’m Jeanette Ohung.

A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,

intends to sue the human race
for stealing our honey,

packaging it and profiting
from it illegally!

Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,

we’ll have three former queens here in
our studio, discussing their new book,

Olassy Ladies,
out this week on Hexagon.

Tonight we’re talking to Barry Benson.

Did you ever think, “I’m a kid
from the hive. I can’t do this”?

Bees have never been afraid
to change the world.

What about Bee Oolumbus?
Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?

Where I’m from, we’d never sue humans.

We were thinking
of stickball or candy stores.

How old are you?

The bee community
is supporting you in this case,

which will be the trial
of the bee century.

You know, they have a Larry King
in the human world too.

It’s a common name. Next week…

He looks like you and has a show
and suspenders and colored dots…

Next week…

Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the
guest even though you just heard 'em.

Bear Week next week!
They’re scary, hairy and here live.

Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,
squinty eyes, very Jewish.

In tennis, you attack
at the point of weakness!

It was my grandmother, Ken. She’s 81.

Honey, her backhand’s a joke!
I’m not gonna take advantage of that?

Quiet, please.
Actual work going on here.

Is that that same bee?
Yes, it is!

I’m helping him sue the human race.

Hello.
Hello, bee.

This is Ken.

Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size
ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.

Why does he talk again?

Listen, you better go
'cause we’re really busy working.

But it’s our yogurt night!

Bye-bye.

Why is yogurt night so difficult?!

You poor thing.
You two have been at this for hours!

Yes, and Adam here
has been a huge help.

Frosting…
How many sugars?

Just one. I try not
to use the competition.

So why are you helping me?

Bees have good qualities.

And it takes my mind off the shop.

Instead of flowers, people
are giving balloon bouquets now.

Those are great, if you’re three.

And artificial flowers.

Oh, those just get me psychotic!
Yeah, me too.

Bent stingers, pointless pollination.

Bees must hate those fake things!

Nothing worse
than a daffodil that’s had work done.

Maybe this could make up
for it a little bit.

This lawsuit’s a pretty big deal.
I guess.

You sure you want to go through with it?

Am I sure? When I’m done with
the humans, they won’t be able

to say, “Honey, I’m home,”
without paying a royalty!

It’s an incredible scene
here in downtown Manhattan,

where the world anxiously waits,
because for the first time in history,

we will hear for ourselves
if a honeybee can actually speak.

What have we gotten into here, Barry?

It’s pretty big, isn’t it?

I can’t believe how many humans
don’t work during the day.

You think billion-dollar multinational
food companies have good lawyers?

Everybody needs to stay
behind the barricade.

What’s the matter?
I don’t know, I just got a chill.

Well, if it isn’t the bee team.

You boys work on this?

All rise! The Honorable
Judge Bumbleton presiding.

All right. Oase number 4475,

Superior Oourt of New York,
Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry

is now in session.

Mr. Montgomery, you’re representing
the five food companies collectively?

A privilege.

Mr. Benson… you’re representing
all the bees of the world?

I’m kidding. Yes, Your Honor,
we’re ready to proceed.

Mr. Montgomery,
your opening statement, please.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,

my grandmother was a simple woman.

Born on a farm, she believed
it was man’s divine right

to benefit from the bounty
of nature God put before us.

If we lived in the topsy-turvy world
Mr. Benson imagines,

just think of what would it mean.

I would have to negotiate
with the silkworm

for the elastic in my britches!

Talking bee!

How do we know this isn’t some sort of

holographic motion-picture-capture
Hollywood wizardry?

They could be using laser beams!

Robotics! Ventriloquism!
Oloning! For all we know,

he could be on steroids!

Mr. Benson?

Ladies and gentlemen,
there’s no trickery here.

I’m just an ordinary bee.
Honey’s pretty important to me.

It’s important to all bees.
We invented it!

We make it. And we protect it
with our lives.

Unfortunately, there are
some people in this room

who think they can take it from us

'cause we’re the little guys!
I’m hoping that, after this is all over,

you’ll see how, by taking our honey,
you not only take everything we have

but everything we are!

I wish he’d dress like that
all the time. So nice!

Oall your first witness.

So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden
of Honey Farms, big company you have.

I suppose so.

I see you also own
Honeyburton and Honron!

Yes, they provide beekeepers
for our farms.

Beekeeper. I find that
to be a very disturbing term.

Bruh_man · October 12, 2021, 2:04am

lol I found it

Vincent · October 12, 2021, 8:10am

You like jazz?

void_12 · October 12, 2021, 8:12am

guys pls help me

Vincent · October 12, 2021, 8:13am

what

void_12 · October 12, 2021, 8:13am

my restriction problem

Vincent · October 12, 2021, 8:13am

do you like jazz?

void_12 · October 12, 2021, 8:14am

ok ok

Vincent · October 12, 2021, 8:14am

lol

void_12 · October 12, 2021, 8:14am

so can u help? i need hackers to hack off the restricter

Vincent · October 12, 2021, 8:15am

well dont ask me im not a hacker

void_12 · October 12, 2021, 8:17am

anon55654059 · June 28, 2025, 10:47pm

Longest text ok The Reliant Robin is a small three-wheeled car produced by the Reliant Motor Company in Tamworth, England. It was offered in several versions (Mk1, Mk2 and Mk3) over a period of 30 years. It is the second-most popular fibreglass car in history after the Chevrolet Corvette, with Reliant being the second-biggest British car manufacturer for a time.[2]

Reliant Robin

1977 Reliant Robin (Mk 1)
Overview
Manufacturer
Reliant
Production
1973–1981 (UK)
1989–2001 (UK revamped)
2001–2002 (B&N Plastics)
Assembly
Tamworth, England
Athens, Greece (1974–1978, under licence)
Burntwood, England
Designer
Ogle Design
Body and chassis
Class
City car (A)
Body style
2-door saloon[1]
3-door estate
3-door hatchback
3-door panel van
Layout
FMR Front-mid engine with rear-wheel drive
Related
Reliant Regal Van
Reliant Kitten[1]
Reliant Rialto
Powertrain
Engine
748 cc OHV I4[1]
848 cc OHV I4
Transmission
4-speed manual all-synchromesh[1]
Dimensions
Wheelbase
85 in (2,159 mm)[1]
Length
131 in (3,327 mm) (saloon)[1]
Width
56 in (1,422 mm)[1]
Height
54 in (1,372 mm)[1]
Chronology
Predecessor
Reliant Regal
Successor
Reliant Rialto (MK.1)
Contents
History
edit
Mk. 1
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 1
The Robin was first manufactured in October 1973[3] as a direct replacement for the Reliant Regal. These models feature a 750 cc engine, but in 1975, the car gained a number of improvements including an engine boost to 850 cc. The Reliant Robin was well received in the 1970s because of good work executed by Ogle Design (who had previously designed the Bond Bug, and Reliant Scimitar) and affordable price, considering 70 and 85 mph (113 and 137 km/h) was possible, and orders increased with the 1970s fuel crisis. The final original version of the Robin rolled off the production line in 1982, and after a number of limited editions, including the GBS and the Jubilee, it was replaced by the restyled Reliant Rialto designed by IAD in Worthing, UK. The vehicle was also produced under licence in Greece by MEBEA between 1974 and 1978.

Mk. 2
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 2
In 1989, Reliant revived the Robin name, producing a new and totally revamped Robin featuring a new fibreglass body featuring a hatchback, with later an estate and van joining the range. The Rialto continued in production alongside the new Robin until 1998 as purely a cheaper model in saloon, estate and van models also. Later on in production, the Robin received new, 12 inch wheels, improved brakes (from the original mini) and an improved interior with new dials and interior trim. Reliant also started offering an unleaded engine (shown by having a green rocker cover) which features hardened exhaust valve seats. As well as this, the new models joined the range with the LX, SLX, BRG, and Royale models. Royale and BRG models were top of the range and cost over £9,000. New colours such as metallic silver, British racing green, royal blue and NightFire red were used, along with a range of retro-style optional extras such as minilite alloy wheels and jaguar custom seat patterns, which then became available on all Robin models.

Mk. 3
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 3
The Robin was redesigned in 1999, with the design executed by Andy Plumb, chief designer at Reliant at that time. This final version was launched boasting the biggest changes since the original launch, with completely new panels and Vauxhall Corsa front lamps. It was the first Robin to be designed with the use of a computer. An electric and a diesel version along with a pickup variant were conceptualised, but never made. A hatchback van was manufactured.

In 2000, it was announced the final Reliant Robin would be built after 65 limited editions were made. It was named the “Reliant Robin 65” and had a very high specification. All 65s had gold metallic paint, red and grey leather seats, red carpets, walnut dashboards, white dials, minilite alloy wheels, premium stereo systems, electronic ignitions and gold plaques on the dashboards which were individually numbered and bore the original owner’s engraved name. The selling price was £10,000. The last Reliant Robin produced was given away by The Sun newspaper in a Valentine’s Day competition in 2001.[4]

Stormlend · June 30, 2025, 11:15am

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anon55654059 · June 30, 2025, 11:44am

Dashing through the snow in my rusty Chevrolet.
Down the road I go, sliding all the way.
I need new piston rings. I need some new snow tires.
My car is held together by a piece of chicken wire!

Oh, rust and smoke, the heater’s broke, the door just blew away.
I light a match to see the dash and then I start to pray-ay.
The frame is bent, the muffler went, the radio’s okay.
Oh, what fun it is to drive this rusty Chevrolet!

I went to IGA, to get some Christmas cheer.
I just passed up my left front tire and it’s gettin’ hard to steer.
Speeding down the highway, right past the county cops.
I have to drag my swampers just to get the car to stop.

Oh, rust and smoke, the heater’s broke, the door just blew away.
I light a match to see the dash and then I start to pray-ay.
The frame is bent, the muffler went, the radio’s okay.
Oh, what fun it is to drive this rusty Chevrolet!

Bouncing through the snowdrifts in a big, blue cloud of smoke. People laugh as I drive by; I wonder what’s the joke!
I have to get to Wal-Mart to pick up my layaway,
Cause Santa’s comin’ soon in his big, old, rusty sleigh!

Oh, rust and smoke, the heater’s broke, the door just blew away.
I light a match to see the dash and then I start to pray-ay.
The frame is bent, the muffler went, the radio’s okay.
Oh, what fun it is to drive this rusttttttttty Chevroooooooleeeeeet! The Reliant Robin is a small three-wheeled car produced by the Reliant Motor Company in Tamworth, England. It was offered in several versions (Mk1, Mk2 and Mk3) over a period of 30 years. It is the second-most popular fibreglass car in history after the Chevrolet Corvette, with Reliant being the second-biggest British car manufacturer for a time.[2]

Reliant Robin

1977 Reliant Robin (Mk 1)
Overview
Manufacturer
Reliant
Production
1973–1981 (UK)
1989–2001 (UK revamped)
2001–2002 (B&N Plastics)
Assembly
Tamworth, England
Athens, Greece (1974–1978, under licence)
Burntwood, England
Designer
Ogle Design
Body and chassis
Class
City car (A)
Body style
2-door saloon[1]
3-door estate
3-door hatchback
3-door panel van
Layout
FMR Front-mid engine with rear-wheel drive
Related
Reliant Regal Van
Reliant Kitten[1]
Reliant Rialto
Powertrain
Engine
748 cc OHV I4[1]
848 cc OHV I4
Transmission
4-speed manual all-synchromesh[1]
Dimensions
Wheelbase
85 in (2,159 mm)[1]
Length
131 in (3,327 mm) (saloon)[1]
Width
56 in (1,422 mm)[1]
Height
54 in (1,372 mm)[1]
Chronology
Predecessor
Reliant Regal
Successor
Reliant Rialto (MK.1)
Contents
History
edit
Mk. 1
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 1
The Robin was first manufactured in October 1973[3] as a direct replacement for the Reliant Regal. These models feature a 750 cc engine, but in 1975, the car gained a number of improvements including an engine boost to 850 cc. The Reliant Robin was well received in the 1970s because of good work executed by Ogle Design (who had previously designed the Bond Bug, and Reliant Scimitar) and affordable price, considering 70 and 85 mph (113 and 137 km/h) was possible, and orders increased with the 1970s fuel crisis. The final original version of the Robin rolled off the production line in 1982, and after a number of limited editions, including the GBS and the Jubilee, it was replaced by the restyled Reliant Rialto designed by IAD in Worthing, UK. The vehicle was also produced under licence in Greece by MEBEA between 1974 and 1978.

Mk. 2
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 2
In 1989, Reliant revived the Robin name, producing a new and totally revamped Robin featuring a new fibreglass body featuring a hatchback, with later an estate and van joining the range. The Rialto continued in production alongside the new Robin until 1998 as purely a cheaper model in saloon, estate and van models also. Later on in production, the Robin received new, 12 inch wheels, improved brakes (from the original mini) and an improved interior with new dials and interior trim. Reliant also started offering an unleaded engine (shown by having a green rocker cover) which features hardened exhaust valve seats. As well as this, the new models joined the range with the LX, SLX, BRG, and Royale models. Royale and BRG models were top of the range and cost over £9,000. New colours such as metallic silver, British racing green, royal blue and NightFire red were used, along with a range of retro-style optional extras such as minilite alloy wheels and jaguar custom seat patterns, which then became available on all Robin models.

Mk. 3
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 3
The Robin was redesigned in 1999, with the design executed by Andy Plumb, chief designer at Reliant at that time. This final version was launched boasting the biggest changes since the original launch, with completely new panels and Vauxhall Corsa front lamps. It was the first Robin to be designed with the use of a computer. An electric and a diesel version along with a pickup variant were conceptualised, but never made. A hatchback van was manufactured.

In 2000, it was announced the final Reliant Robin would be built after 65 limited editions were made. It was named the “Reliant Robin 65” and had a very high specification. All 65s had gold metallic paint, red and grey leather seats, red carpets, walnut dashboards, white dials, minilite alloy wheels, premium stereo systems, electronic ignitions and gold plaques on the dashboards which were individually numbered and bore the original owner’s engraved name. The selling price was £10,000. The last Reliant Robin produced was given away by The Sun newspaper in a Valentine’s Day competition in 2001.[4] Methionylalanylthreonylserylarginylglycylalanylserylarginylcysteinylproly-larginylaspartylisoleucylalanylasparaginylvalylmethionylglutaminylarginyl-leucylglutaminylaspartylglutamylglutaminylglutamylisoleucylvalylglutaminy-llysylarginylthreonylphenylalanylthreonyllysyltryptophylisoleucylasparagi-nylserylhistidylleucylalanyllysylarginyllysylprolylprolylmethionylvalylva-lylaspartylaspartylleucylphenylalanylglutamylaspartylmethionyllysylaspart-ylglycylvalyllysylleucylleucylalanylleucylleucylglutamylvalylleucylserylg-lycylglutaminyllysylleucylprolylcysteinylglutamylglutaminylglycylarginyla-rginylmethionyllysylarginylisoleucylhistidylalanylvalylalanylasparaginyli-soleucylglycylthreonylalanylleucyllysylphenylalanylleucylglutamylglycylar-ginyllysylisoleucyllysylleucylvalylasparaginylisoleucylasparaginylserylth-reonylaspartylisoleucylalanylaspartylglycylarginylprolylserylisoleucylval-ylleucylglycylleucylmethionyltryptophylthreonylisoleucylisoleucylleucylty-rosylphenylalanylglutaminylisoleucylglutamylglutamylleucylthreonylserylas-paraginylleucylprolylglutaminylleucylglutaminylserylleucylserylserylseryl-alanylserylserylvalylaspartylserylisoleucylvalylserylserylglutamylthreony-1prolylserylprolylprolylseryllysylarginyllysylvalylthreonylthreonyllysyli-soleucylglutaminylglycylasparaginylalanyllysyllysylalanylleucylleucyllysy- The Reliant Robin is a small three-wheeled car produced by the Reliant Motor Company in Tamworth, England. It was offered in several versions (Mk1, Mk2 and Mk3) over a period of 30 years. It is the second-most popular fibreglass car in history after the Chevrolet Corvette, with Reliant being the second-biggest British car manufacturer for a time.[2]

Reliant Robin

1977 Reliant Robin (Mk 1)
Overview
Manufacturer
Reliant
Production
1973–1981 (UK)
1989–2001 (UK revamped)
2001–2002 (B&N Plastics)
Assembly
Tamworth, England
Athens, Greece (1974–1978, under licence)
Burntwood, England
Designer
Ogle Design
Body and chassis
Class
City car (A)
Body style
2-door saloon[1]
3-door estate
3-door hatchback
3-door panel van
Layout
FMR Front-mid engine with rear-wheel drive
Related
Reliant Regal Van
Reliant Kitten[1]
Reliant Rialto
Powertrain
Engine
748 cc OHV I4[1]
848 cc OHV I4
Transmission
4-speed manual all-synchromesh[1]
Dimensions
Wheelbase
85 in (2,159 mm)[1]
Length
131 in (3,327 mm) (saloon)[1]
Width
56 in (1,422 mm)[1]
Height
54 in (1,372 mm)[1]
Chronology
Predecessor
Reliant Regal
Successor
Reliant Rialto (MK.1)
Contents
History
edit
Mk. 1
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 1
The Robin was first manufactured in October 1973[3] as a direct replacement for the Reliant Regal. These models feature a 750 cc engine, but in 1975, the car gained a number of improvements including an engine boost to 850 cc. The Reliant Robin was well received in the 1970s because of good work executed by Ogle Design (who had previously designed the Bond Bug, and Reliant Scimitar) and affordable price, considering 70 and 85 mph (113 and 137 km/h) was possible, and orders increased with the 1970s fuel crisis. The final original version of the Robin rolled off the production line in 1982, and after a number of limited editions, including the GBS and the Jubilee, it was replaced by the restyled Reliant Rialto designed by IAD in Worthing, UK. The vehicle was also produced under licence in Greece by MEBEA between 1974 and 1978.

Mk. 2
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 2
In 1989, Reliant revived the Robin name, producing a new and totally revamped Robin featuring a new fibreglass body featuring a hatchback, with later an estate and van joining the range. The Rialto continued in production alongside the new Robin until 1998 as purely a cheaper model in saloon, estate and van models also. Later on in production, the Robin received new, 12 inch wheels, improved brakes (from the original mini) and an improved interior with new dials and interior trim. Reliant also started offering an unleaded engine (shown by having a green rocker cover) which features hardened exhaust valve seats. As well as this, the new models joined the range with the LX, SLX, BRG, and Royale models. Royale and BRG models were top of the range and cost over £9,000. New colours such as metallic silver, British racing green, royal blue and NightFire red were used, along with a range of retro-style optional extras such as minilite alloy wheels and jaguar custom seat patterns, which then became available on all Robin models.

Mk. 3
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 3
The Robin was redesigned in 1999, with the design executed by Andy Plumb, chief designer at Reliant at that time. This final version was launched boasting the biggest changes since the original launch, with completely new panels and Vauxhall Corsa front lamps. It was the first Robin to be designed with the use of a computer. An electric and a diesel version along with a pickup variant were conceptualised, but never made. A hatchback van was manufactured.

In 2000, it was announced the final Reliant Robin would be built after 65 limited editions were made. It was named the “Reliant Robin 65” and had a very high specification. All 65s had gold metallic paint, red and grey leather seats, red carpets, walnut dashboards, white dials, minilite alloy wheels, premium stereo systems, electronic ignitions and gold plaques on the dashboards which were individually numbered and bore the original owner’s engraved name. The selling price was £10,000. The last Reliant Robin produced was given away by The Sun newspaper in a Valentine’s Day competition in 2001.[4]The Reliant Robin is a small three-wheeled car produced by the Reliant Motor Company in Tamworth, England. It was offered in several versions (Mk1, Mk2 and Mk3) over a period of 30 years. It is the second-most popular fibreglass car in history after the Chevrolet Corvette, with Reliant being the second-biggest British car manufacturer for a time.[2]

Reliant Robin

1977 Reliant Robin (Mk 1)
Overview
Manufacturer
Reliant
Production
1973–1981 (UK)
1989–2001 (UK revamped)
2001–2002 (B&N Plastics)
Assembly
Tamworth, England
Athens, Greece (1974–1978, under licence)
Burntwood, England
Designer
Ogle Design
Body and chassis
Class
City car (A)
Body style
2-door saloon[1]
3-door estate
3-door hatchback
3-door panel van
Layout
FMR Front-mid engine with rear-wheel drive
Related
Reliant Regal Van
Reliant Kitten[1]
Reliant Rialto
Powertrain
Engine
748 cc OHV I4[1]
848 cc OHV I4
Transmission
4-speed manual all-synchromesh[1]
Dimensions
Wheelbase
85 in (2,159 mm)[1]
Length
131 in (3,327 mm) (saloon)[1]
Width
56 in (1,422 mm)[1]
Height
54 in (1,372 mm)[1]
Chronology
Predecessor
Reliant Regal
Successor
Reliant Rialto (MK.1)
Contents
History
edit
Mk. 1
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 1
The Robin was first manufactured in October 1973[3] as a direct replacement for the Reliant Regal. These models feature a 750 cc engine, but in 1975, the car gained a number of improvements including an engine boost to 850 cc. The Reliant Robin was well received in the 1970s because of good work executed by Ogle Design (who had previously designed the Bond Bug, and Reliant Scimitar) and affordable price, considering 70 and 85 mph (113 and 137 km/h) was possible, and orders increased with the 1970s fuel crisis. The final original version of the Robin rolled off the production line in 1982, and after a number of limited editions, including the GBS and the Jubilee, it was replaced by the restyled Reliant Rialto designed by IAD in Worthing, UK. The vehicle was also produced under licence in Greece by MEBEA between 1974 and 1978.

Mk. 2
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 2
In 1989, Reliant revived the Robin name, producing a new and totally revamped Robin featuring a new fibreglass body featuring a hatchback, with later an estate and van joining the range. The Rialto continued in production alongside the new Robin until 1998 as purely a cheaper model in saloon, estate and van models also. Later on in production, the Robin received new, 12 inch wheels, improved brakes (from the original mini) and an improved interior with new dials and interior trim. Reliant also started offering an unleaded engine (shown by having a green rocker cover) which features hardened exhaust valve seats. As well as this, the new models joined the range with the LX, SLX, BRG, and Royale models. Royale and BRG models were top of the range and cost over £9,000. New colours such as metallic silver, British racing green, royal blue and NightFire red were used, along with a range of retro-style optional extras such as minilite alloy wheels and jaguar custom seat patterns, which then became available on all Robin models.

Mk. 3
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 3
The Robin was redesigned in 1999, with the design executed by Andy Plumb, chief designer at Reliant at that time. This final version was launched boasting the biggest changes since the original launch, with completely new panels and Vauxhall Corsa front lamps. It was the first Robin to be designed with the use of a computer. An electric and a diesel version along with a pickup variant were conceptualised, but never made. A hatchback van was manufactured.

In 2000, it was announced the final Reliant Robin would be built after 65 limited editions were made. It was named the “Reliant Robin 65” and had a very high specification. All 65s had gold metallic paint, red and grey leather seats, red carpets, walnut dashboards, white dials, minilite alloy wheels, premium stereo systems, electronic ignitions and gold plaques on the dashboards which were individually numbered and bore the original owner’s engraved name. The selling price was £10,000. The last Reliant Robin produced was given away by The Sun newspaper in a Valentine’s Day competition in 2001.[4] Methionylalanylthreonylserylarginylglycylalanylserylarginylcysteinylproly-larginylaspartylisoleucylalanylasparaginylvalylmethionylglutaminylarginyl-leucylglutaminylaspartylglutamylglutaminylglutamylisoleucylvalylglutaminy-llysylarginylthreonylphenylalanylthreonyllysyltryptophylisoleucylasparagi-nylserylhistidylleucylalanyllysylarginyllysylprolylprolylmethionylvalylva-lylaspartylaspartylleucylphenylalanylglutamylaspartylmethionyllysylaspart-ylglycylvalyllysylleucylleucylalanylleucylleucylglutamylvalylleucylserylg-lycylglutaminyllysylleucylprolylcysteinylglutamylglutaminylglycylarginyla-rginylmethionyllysylarginylisoleucylhistidylalanylvalylalanylasparaginyli-soleucylglycylthreonylalanylleucyllysylphenylalanylleucylglutamylglycylar-ginyllysylisoleucyllysylleucylvalylasparaginylisoleucylasparaginylserylth-reonylaspartylisoleucylalanylaspartylglycylarginylprolylserylisoleucylval-ylleucylglycylleucylmethionyltryptophylthreonylisoleucylisoleucylleucylty-rosylphenylalanylglutaminylisoleucylglutamylglutamylleucylthreonylserylas-paraginylleucylprolylglutaminylleucylglutaminylserylleucylserylserylseryl-alanylserylserylvalylaspartylserylisoleucylvalylserylserylglutamylthreony-1prolylserylprolylprolylseryllysylarginyllysylvalylthreonylthreonyllysyli-soleucylglutaminylglycylasparaginylalanyllysyllysylalanylleucylleucyllysy- The Reliant Robin is a small three-wheeled car produced by the Reliant Motor Company in Tamworth, England. It was offered in several versions (Mk1, Mk2 and Mk3) over a period of 30 years. It is the second-most popular fibreglass car in history after the Chevrolet Corvette, with Reliant being the second-biggest British car manufacturer for a time.[2]

Reliant Robin

1977 Reliant Robin (Mk 1)
Overview
Manufacturer
Reliant
Production
1973–1981 (UK)
1989–2001 (UK revamped)
2001–2002 (B&N Plastics)
Assembly
Tamworth, England
Athens, Greece (1974–1978, under licence)
Burntwood, England
Designer
Ogle Design
Body and chassis
Class
City car (A)
Body style
2-door saloon[1]
3-door estate
3-door hatchback
3-door panel van
Layout
FMR Front-mid engine with rear-wheel drive
Related
Reliant Regal Van
Reliant Kitten[1]
Reliant Rialto
Powertrain
Engine
748 cc OHV I4[1]
848 cc OHV I4
Transmission
4-speed manual all-synchromesh[1]
Dimensions
Wheelbase
85 in (2,159 mm)[1]
Length
131 in (3,327 mm) (saloon)[1]
Width
56 in (1,422 mm)[1]
Height
54 in (1,372 mm)[1]
Chronology
Predecessor
Reliant Regal
Successor
Reliant Rialto (MK.1)
Contents
History
edit
Mk. 1
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 1
The Robin was first manufactured in October 1973[3] as a direct replacement for the Reliant Regal. These models feature a 750 cc engine, but in 1975, the car gained a number of improvements including an engine boost to 850 cc. The Reliant Robin was well received in the 1970s because of good work executed by Ogle Design (who had previously designed the Bond Bug, and Reliant Scimitar) and affordable price, considering 70 and 85 mph (113 and 137 km/h) was possible, and orders increased with the 1970s fuel crisis. The final original version of the Robin rolled off the production line in 1982, and after a number of limited editions, including the GBS and the Jubilee, it was replaced by the restyled Reliant Rialto designed by IAD in Worthing, UK. The vehicle was also produced under licence in Greece by MEBEA between 1974 and 1978.

Mk. 2
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 2
In 1989, Reliant revived the Robin name, producing a new and totally revamped Robin featuring a new fibreglass body featuring a hatchback, with later an estate and van joining the range. The Rialto continued in production alongside the new Robin until 1998 as purely a cheaper model in saloon, estate and van models also. Later on in production, the Robin received new, 12 inch wheels, improved brakes (from the original mini) and an improved interior with new dials and interior trim. Reliant also started offering an unleaded engine (shown by having a green rocker cover) which features hardened exhaust valve seats. As well as this, the new models joined the range with the LX, SLX, BRG, and Royale models. Royale and BRG models were top of the range and cost over £9,000. New colours such as metallic silver, British racing green, royal blue and NightFire red were used, along with a range of retro-style optional extras such as minilite alloy wheels and jaguar custom seat patterns, which then became available on all Robin models.

Mk. 3
edit

Reliant Robin Mk 3
The Robin was redesigned in 1999, with the design executed by Andy Plumb, chief designer at Reliant at that time. This final version was launched boasting the biggest changes since the original launch, with completely new panels and Vauxhall Corsa front lamps. It was the first Robin to be designed with the use of a computer. An electric and a diesel version along with a pickup variant were conceptualised, but never made. A hatchback van was manufactured.

In 2000, it was announced the final Reliant Robin would be built after 65 limited editions were made. It was named the “Reliant Robin 65” and had a very high specification. All 65s had gold metallic paint, red and grey leather seats, red carpets, walnut dashboards, white dials, minilite alloy wheels, premium stereo systems, electronic ignitions and gold plaques on the dashboards which were individually numbered and bore the original owner’s engraved name. The selling price was £10,000. The last Reliant Robin produced was given away by The Sun newspaper in a Valentine’s Day competition in 2001.[4]

STREnergy · June 30, 2025, 11:52am

this is just spam in the form of a topic

close?

Yes
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0 voters

Stormlend · June 30, 2025, 11:53am

No, go in the private chat
I just did a test to confirm my theory

VFOS_Radio_Tower · May 29, 2026, 2:18am

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